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::Be the Butterfly::
A Journey in Metamorphosis
::Author::  Name::The Catapillar From::Houston, Texas My cacoon has begun to shed and I can see a glimps of the butterfly. I had Rny Gastric Bypass on 12/21/05 and these are my chroniclings... Weight Stats: Begining/Current/Goal 283/187/140 Butterfly Image from: http://www.tropicaldaystar.com View my complete 
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Sunday, July 02, 2006 Fly DISCOVERY Fly  Just in case you were interested and you do not have NASA TV on your cable network... You can go here to watch Discovery Launch. Please pray for the Astronauts and thier families that there is a safe, successful flight. This picture listed is of last years Discovery Mission.STS-121 crew members: Pilot Mark E. Kelly Go Discovery!  
I am so upset I had my son at a very young age. I was only 19 when I had him and his father was 18. Both of us too young to take on such a huge responsibility I have been charged with the monumental task of raising a son. Apparently I am to do this on my own, either for me or for him. This job is the most important job that anyone can be given. I have accepted this task and hope that I do as God needs me to do with him. Heaven knows, it can be difficult. Now during this time, life is not about ME its about ANGEL. It’s my job to ensure that he becomes a good man, husband, and father. I take my job very seriously. With Angel it’s pretty easy; he is a great kid and has a fantastic heart. I just need to keep him focused. In the 13 years that Angel has been mine his father has been mostly absentee. There has always been a standing offer to him to be apart of Angels life and I have always honored his requests to see his son. This has not been due to any need that I have had because if it were up to me I could care less if I ever spoke to him again. But my son needs his father… therefore; I try and make sure that his father is always given the right to see him. We moved to California, Angel wanted to make sure his dad knew were we were so I hunted him down. Finding him living only 5 minutes away from us for more that three years and no contact from him what so ever. My father has worked in the same place for 20 years! No contact there either. There has been no court order! I don’t have to allow visitation! I have not insisted on child support! When I was contacted after a 3 year absence by him I said it’s about time. I let him go to another friggen state to visit. Not only was that it for 6 full weeks! Then the next summer and then spring break. There is no court order for me to allow visitation and I have never pressed the issue of child support. Money has never been a requirement to his visits. I have watched my young son cry himself to sleep because he thought his father hated him. I would always tell him that his dad loved him but sometimes it took a little time for people to realize their responsibilities. I would tell him stories of when he was an infant and his dad would take care of him and play with him. I created a photo album of pics of his father and family and himself. I have told him stories of when his dad and I were first dating. Later I watched my son wonder what he did wrong to make his dad go away. Recently I have seen the next phase. Now he is getting pissed. His father has a new family now. I know his new wife and she is awesome. I think she is the reason that Angels dad has made contact. She has made Angel feel welcomed in her home and from the conversations I have had with her has put my mind at ease that she does care for him. For that I am eternally grateful! They were recently blessed with a child of their own. I am happy for them. But since the new baby has been born (back in may) Today was the first day “dad” has called. My son has been pretty upset about it. So upset in fact that he opted out of calling him on father’s day. And to top it off when Angel went for spring break they took a family trip to Vegas and after having a drink (or two maybe) He actually told my son he was tired of me asking for money. Yea I’ve asked but who the hell says to their child “I’m tired of someone asking me to take care of you.” Today he actually said to me that my son needs to call him… WHAT! I don’t think so. The person needing to make an effort is the grown up not the child. I wish I had said - grow the F--- Up and take care of your responsibilities. You are the man and my son does not need to prove anything to you. For years he has loved you even though you weren’t there. He has regarded the times he has had with him highly. Now is the most important time for the child to have his father. And you need to take this seriously and realize that you need to fix what you have broken and it takes more then phone calls and plane tickets. It takes thinking about your children and how they feel, and realizing that they rely on us as the grown ups! Not the other way around! It takes being a MAN! I want nothing more than for my son to have a good healthy relationship with his father. I have tried for 13 years. I am out of it now. Angel is old enough now to make up his own mind. I am going to support my child’s stance on this. What ever he decides… I could go on and on but there is not enough space on the internet for everything that I could say.
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